


How to Defrost a Spider

by bunnyfacecucumber



Series: Holiday Bingo 2020 [2]
Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Hypothermia, M/M, Slash, Snowed In, Spideypool - Freeform, Spit As Lube, blizzard, bromanticbingo2020, cabin in the woods, spider-man/deadpool - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-16
Updated: 2020-12-16
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:00:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28105137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bunnyfacecucumber/pseuds/bunnyfacecucumber
Summary: It was supposed to be a romantic weekend away, but Wade hadn't counted on the blizzard.
Relationships: Peter Parker/Wade Wilson
Series: Holiday Bingo 2020 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2059002
Comments: 8
Kudos: 86
Collections: Isn't it Bromantic- Holiday Bingo 2020





	How to Defrost a Spider

**Author's Note:**

> for the bromantic discord event: bromanticbingo2020
> 
> fills square: snowed in
> 
> not beta'd

“Look at this, Petey Pie! It says here that spiders are cold-blooded, so they don’t get cold in the winter. In fact, some species have a type of antifreeze in their blood that prevents them from freezing at temperatures down to -5 degrees celsius or lower!” Wade held out his phone to Peter, showing a google page with the search line reading “ _ What do spiders do when they get cold” _ .

Peter pushed the phone out of his face in a huff, hands shaking despite the 3 layers of gloves covering them. “I t-told you, W-wade. I d-didn’t get  _ all _ the t-traits of the spider that b-bit me,” he stuttered at his boyfriend, an angry glint in his eye. 

“That’s a shame,” Wade shook his head, “Guess I’ll never know if I have a kink for extra legs.” He laughed, dancing out of the way as Peter took a swing at him.

  
  


Truth be told, Wade was only joking around so much because he was worried about him. Peter's lips were dusty blue and his cheeks, once bright red from the temperature, were quickly turning the same shade. Thankfully, Webs was still shivering, which meant hypothermia, while not far off, had yet to set in. 

This was Wade's fault though, wasn't it? Well, maybe it was actually Logan's fault. After all, it was  _ his _ cabin. That being said, if Wade had asked to use his cabin instead of break in for a romantic weekend away with the boyfriend, he might've been able to tell Wade that the generator was broken. 

Wade had found said generator behind the cabin, three long gashes slashed through it. A storm had started up once they'd arrived, and Wade had had to fight the blizzard just to check the damn thing in the first place. Once back inside the cabin, it must've been less than 10 minutes before they could no longer open the door for the snow. 

"Hey!" Peter snapped his fingers in front of Wade's face. "St-stop zoning out-t on me. I n-need you here."

Wade shook his head a little, clearing the thoughts that insisted he'd just led his boyfriend to his death, and plastered a goofy smile on his face. "All good, baby boy. Not goin' anywhere." 

"How are y-you not freezing?" 

"That's just a benefit of immortality, Petey." Wade shrugged.

Peter shook his head, lamenting the fact that his own healing factor was not nearly as strong. But, maybe it was helping some, because Peter was feeling warmer as the minutes passed. Even now, he felt himself shivering less and less. This was a good sign, since they had to wait out the storm just to be able to drive home, even if Peter could've gotten the door open. 

That was the first thing they tried once they realized they'd been snowed in. It was quickly determined that Peter's powers very much relied on him not shivering so much. All of his strength had been frozen out of him. 

The next thing they thought of was just calling someone to come get them. That was a short-lived idea, since neither of them knew anyone who would come in a storm like this. May was too elderly, Weasel didn't care enough, and Logan had both their numbers blocked. 

Wade had noticed the shivering lessening bit by bit, and was starting to truly panic. Who knew how long this storm would last? Standing around doing nothing was causing Wade to lose his fucking mind. 

"Why doesn't Gillette Smooth Shave keep any blankets in this fucking place??" He started pacing around the small cabin, looking through cupboards and throwing dusty board games and rusty pans onto the floor.

"I d-don't think he's been here in awhile, Wade. It's fine, calm d-down. My healing factor is finally kicking in, see? I'm even feeling a little warm." Wade looked over to see Pete smiling at him, lips and cheeks gray and ashen, as he started pulling off his multiple layers.

"No. No Peter, it hasn't. Stop that!" Another layer came off. "Peter, you're experiencing hyperthermia. You aren't thinking straight." He strode over to Peter, grabbing his hands in one of his, while his other reached down to grab one of the many coats Peter had been wearing. 

"I'm fine!" Peter tried to wrench his hands out of Wade's grasp, but his strength was greatly weakened from the cold. Wade didn't even need to use all of his own strength to keep him from breaking free. He tried to wrap a coat around Peter, but the little shit shrugged it off.

"I'm sorry, baby boy, but you have to let me keep you warm. You'll die if I let you take all your clothes off." Wade pleaded.

"Warm me up yourself, you coward." Peter struggled again, this time breaking free but only because Wade was taken aback by the comment.

' _ No shit, dumbass! Warm him up  _ **_yourself_ ** _ ' _

Peter was now shirtless and struggling to pull 5 layers of pants down all at the same time. Wade grabbed him again.

"No, st- mmfh!" Peter's indignant cry was cut off as Wade crushed their mouths together, his scarred tongue sliding into the other's mouth as if to chase away the cold. 

Wade backed off only long enough to pull his own shirt off and then he was back on Peter, pushing him backwards until his back hit the cabin wall. He hefted the lighter man up, which prompted Peter to wrap his legs around the other's hips, moaning into the kiss.

Wade broke for air, "I'm gonna warm you up, ok baby boy?" He asked. Peter gave him a single nod, then leaned back in, chasing Wade's lips with his own. Wade leaned back a little further.

"You're not in your right mind, so I need a verbal reply, Petey." 

"Yes, yes! Wade, fuck me!" Peter gasped, as if for air.

That was all Wade needed. He dropped Peter to his feet, but before he could complain, Wade was on his knees before him, tugging all those pant layers down. Once Peter's hard dick was free, Wade engulfed it entirely, until his nose hit his boyfriend's pubic bone. Somewhere between a gasp and a shriek sounded from above, then icy hands gripped the back of his head.

Wade bobbed his head, stopping to lick the tip every few seconds. The moans and the exclamations of "yes, Wade, please" were melodic and drove Wade on. He buried his nose into Peter's pubic hair and swallowed around his member, once, twice…. 

"Wade, Wade I'm gonna cum, Wade I'm gonna-" Peter moaned and Wade nearly choked on the salty fluid that suddenly filled his mouth and ran down his throat. Once the onslaught ceased, Wade leaned back and looked up. Peter was gasping, chest heaving and a faint blush coloring his cheeks. This was working. 

Wade stood and helped Peter step out of his pants. Peter then grabbed the waistband of Wade's sweats and ripped them clean away. 

"Looks like your strength is returning," Wade commented. He didn't get a reply, though. It seemed Petey was too busy climbing back into Wade's arms, legs straddling him once again. 

"Fuck, ok, let me open you up then…" his hand was smacked away and spit-slick, cold fingers grabbed his member, positioning him.

"No, get in me, now." Peter growled, then let himself drop down, impaling himself on Wade's cock. 

"Holy fuck!" Wade exclaimed. He was not surrounded by the velvet heat he was used to. No, this was  _ cold.  _ And it felt  _ good. _

"Baby boy, you're cold on the inside, too. God damn…." Even as Wade babbled, Peter started fucking himself on his dick, giving him little time to adjust. But adjust Wade did, and once he had, he grabbed the little spider's hips and took control.

Peter was now sweating, his dripping forehead buried in the crook of Wade's neck, rocking with the force of Wade's thrusts. "Fuck, Spidey, you look so good like this. You're taking my cock so well. Look at you, so good for me, letting me warm you up. God, you feel so good, petey pie, so fucking good." Wade had picked up babbling again, heartened by how warm Peter was starting to feel, outside  _ and _ in. 

Peter could only moan and grunt in reply.

"Fuck, baby, I don't think I'm gonna last much longer." Wade sped up his trusts and reached between them to grab Peter's rehardened member. He stroked it in time, as best as he could.

"Mmmm Wade don' stop. Feels s'good." Peter mumbled into his neck. 

Wade moaned his own response and kept it up, trying to pull another climax out of Peter. That didn't prove to be especially difficult, since a few moments later, Peter gasped and spilled into Wade's hand. As he came, he dug his teeth into Wade's neck. That, coupled with the way Peter's hole tightened around him, had Wade following him over seconds later, stripes of cum painting his insides.

They stayed like that for several moments, panting. Wade was the first to speak: "You have to keep my cum in that sweet ass of yours, so it can keep you warm."

The proof that Peter was back to himself came in the form of a smack to Wade's head. "Shuddup, 'Pool." His smile softened the blow, but faded slightly when he looked out the window. "Storm's not over yet…. I'm going to get cold again, just a matter of time." He looked back at Wade.

Wade's blinding smile made the anxiety melt out of Peter's heart. 

"Don't worry, Petey pie. Lucky for you, I'm part energizer bunny. I can keep going and going." The line was cheesy but Peter chuckled and leaned back down for another searing kiss.

Maybe this weekend could still be romantic. 

**Author's Note:**

> let me know how I did! <3


End file.
